“He Choked Me”: Understanding the Danger of Strangulation
If your partner has ever put their hands around your neck, used a “sleeper hold,” or wrapped an object like a scarf, belt, or rope around your throat, you have been strangled.
Strangulation is the act of cutting off your airway or blood flow to your brain, depriving it of vital oxygen. While people often picture hands, a forearm (chokehold), or a ligature, it can also happen through less obvious methods, such as someone sitting heavy on your chest, putting a knee to your back, or applying pressure to your neck with a foot or object.
Regardless of the method used, the result is the same: your brain is starved of oxygen.
While many survivors use terms like "my boyfriend choked me" or "my partner choked me," the medical and legal term for someone else cutting off your breath is strangulation. This is one of the most lethal forms of domestic violence. It is a tactic used by abusers to exert power and control, demonstrating that they have the literal power of life and death over you.
Strangulation vs. Choking: What’s the Difference?
Though these terms are often used interchangeably, they are medically different:
Choking
- an internal blockage of the airway, like food stuck in the throat
Strangulation
- an external force that closes the airway or compresses the carotid arteries, stopping blood from reaching the brain
Strangulation Affects Everyone: Breaking Gender Stereotypes
While the majority of reported strangulation cases in domestic violence involve male perpetrators and female victims, it is a dangerous misconception that this form of abuse is exclusive to one gender. Domestic violence and the use of strangulation as a tactic of control can occur in any relationship, regardless of the gender or sexual orientation of those involved. Men can be victims of strangulation by female partners, and it is a significant concern within LGBTQ+ relationships, where power dynamics and non-fatal strangulation are used to terrorize and silence victims. Recognizing that anyone can be an abuser and anyone can be a victim is essential for ensuring that all survivors feel empowered to seek medical help and legal protection without the fear of being dismissed or stigmatized.
The Danger of Non-Fatal Strangulation
Research shows that strangulation is a major "red flag" for future homicide. If your partner has strangled you—even if you didn't lose consciousness—your risk of being killed by them increases by 10 times (1,000%).
Common Symptoms of Strangulation
Not all severe injuries leave a mark. Up to 50% of strangulation survivors have no visible external injuries or neck marks, and only a small fraction show bruises clear enough to be captured on camera. However, the absence of bruising does not mean you are out of danger.
Internal injuries can be life-threatening even if you feel "fine" initially. Serious internal complications can still occur without any visible signs on the skin. L ook for these physical and psychological signs:
- Airway & Throat: Difficulty breathing, persistent cough, sore throat, difficulty swallowing, or hoarseness.
- Visible Marks: Bruising on the neck or behind the ears, tiny red spots on the skin (petechiae), bloodshot eyes, or discoloration on the tongue.
- Neurological: Dizziness, memory loss, ringing in the ears (tinnitus), or fainting.
- Behavioral: Changes in vision, mood swings (agitation/aggression), or sleep disturbances.
What to Do If You Have Been Strangled
If your airway has been restricted or you have experienced a strangulation assault, your safety is always the priority.
- Seek Medical Attention Immediately: Call 911 or go to an emergency room. Internal swelling can close your airway hours after the attack has ended.
- Don’t Be Alone: Stay with someone you trust for at least 24 hours to monitor for delayed symptoms or a stroke.
- Document the Assault: Take photos of your neck, face, and eyes over several days.
Support and Financial Assistance
In Pennsylvania, medical costs may be covered by the Pennsylvania Crime Victim Compensation Program. To discuss your safety and options, contact a Domestic Abuse Team Advocate at 215-852-9826 or visit our Resource Page.
Strangulation and Pennsylvania Law
In Pennsylvania, strangulation is a serious stand-alone criminal offense under 18 Pa. C.S. § 2718. The law defines it as knowingly or intentionally impeding the breathing or blood circulation of another person by applying pressure to the throat or neck or by blocking the nose and mouth. Critically, the law states that physical injury is not required for a person to be charged or convicted; the absence of visible marks or bruises is not a defense.
While the baseline charge is a misdemeanor, Pennsylvania law automatically elevates strangulation to a second-degree felony (punishable by up to 10 years in prison) if it is committed against a "family or household member," which includes spouses, intimate partners, or individuals you live with. The charge can be further increased to a first-degree felony (up to 20 years in prison) if there is an active Protection from Abuse (PFA) order in place, if a weapon was used, or if the perpetrator has a prior strangulation conviction.